Conan Sexiness! (Fun with Funcom)

According to the Age of Conan manual,


Please go to and enter your Funcom account name and password. Your existing Funcom account information will appear whether or not you have a current subscription. Choose Add a Game Subscription and enter your … key.

Well, ok; lets see if I can use my old Air Warrior account.

 Interesting lack of an “Add a Game Subscription” option

Well, lets see what my account details are. Probably still registered to England!

Apparently this site has the same fashion-sense as WWIIOL’s early web pages, believing that links should be discovered rather than indicated on the screen, that text should look like text whether it is clickable or not!

I guess I’ll try clicking on the Conan icon next to “View my Subscription”.


Hmm. That looks distinctly like Anarchy online. WTF? Oh, yeah. Funcom. I try clicking back only to be taken back to Anarchy Online pages, where I appear to be stuck until I finally log out and restart the browser. After that, it doesn’t happen again.

Did someone actually think “Hey, the Anarchy Online subscription pages work so excellently, Age of Conan really needs some of that sweetness to make absolutely certain it has the best launch of any MMO ever”?

So back at the first menu, I try “Use a Key to add a Prepaid Card, Upgrade a Subscription or Create a Subscription”, since they seem similar to the link I was told to click.

It asks me to enter all the pertinent details, which I do, only to complain “Account already exists”. Doh! I can’t not enter my account details to re-use the account I’m logged in with. What the heck?

Ok, back to the main menu and let’s try “Create a new subscription”:

Ok – this looks like it!

NOOOOOOO! What? What the hell? (Note: Ramp asked if the text at the top of that page was links. I glared at him hatefully, on behalf of all of you who have ever tried to use our websites and thought “why is it only possible to tell what is a link by mousing over it”).

Both Bloo and Ramp wander into my office and try to guide me to subscription, without success. We try the “Early Access” subscription box at the top of the page (in desperation) but all this does is tell me that my key is valid for Age of Conan, and suggests I try creating a new subscription.

Ok, ok. I think I probably need to contact support…

… only to have my input rejected because the subject contains a question mark. Holy crap – I remember that from back in 2002 when I had problems cancelling my Anarchy Online account! (What’s that distant ringing sound?)

Well, OK. I will make my support request a statement then:

I know, I know – glass houses and stones and all that. But – Anarchy Online and WWIIOL launched in a similar time frame and with similar … finesse (pause for giggles that turn into laughter). At least if we launched a new game tomorrow, it would be different, new and exciting, things that were broken ;)

I guess I’ll just create a new account then.


Sounds like 2001 – trying to get a account at ….what was the name?…

Back in this days, CRS thought all the world has a credit card.

Sounds like 2001 – trying to get an account at … what was the name? ;-P

Apparently you missed the part where I drew the comparison with WWIIOLs launch, which is why you also missed the part where this is their second MMO launch (their first being Anarchy Online), which is effectively special permission for stone throwing.

I had the exact same issue. I dont like creating new logins. In fact I think it’s the dumbest idea.

I fully support funcom and AO. But this was a pretty big oversight.


After about 30 seconds I realized the sillyness that is Funcom’s login.

My normal login allows me access to my subscription info. Sure enough, I saw both my Ao login AND my AoC login under my account.

Silly, odd, but at least I’m listed under one account.

Leave a Reply

Name and email address are required. Your email address will not be published.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

You may use these HTML tags and attributes:

<a href="" title="" rel=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <pre> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong> 

%d bloggers like this: